Addictive Gaming Behavior

I have played game since I was 10 years old. Gaming technology at that time is still underdeveloped and simple. I remember I could sit in front the television for hours to play the simple soccer and rambo games. A few years later, it's getting a little bit crazier when they combine the internet and games together so that we have what calls: online game. As the technology grows, games with stunning graphics and fancy contents keep being produced and competing each other. The first game I got addicted to is Counter Strike. A very popular shooting game in which you team up, search for your enemies and destroy them. If it was computers that I'm playing with, I wouldn't be bother to play it. But the best thing of online games is it brings your friends and people around the the world together in a single battle and have fun.
Online game is addictive because it is capable of forming an in-game relationship, especially in huge-successful online games like the World of Warcraft, Lineage, and Counter Strike... The moment I join the game, I actually feel like I am a part of that community. Players that lack of social skills might end up spending hours on these games. Because in the game, all you need is fighting skills and endless training hours. The more time you spend on the game, the better you become. As a result, you can join any in-game community where people recognize you and shows you a lot of respects. That certainly make you feel good about yourself. And that's why a lot of online players spend the whole day and night on their computer training and seeking to be the best of the game.

Nocturnal behavior in human being?

     Recently, I am having this unexplainable behavior. I stay up extremely late playing game, smoking, surfing web, writing blogs and stuff... and sleep more at day time. My body certainly feel really tired and weird when I am doing that. But I can't stop this unusual behaviors. I feel sleepy, yet I don't want to go to sleep. I feel like time is so limited while I am having so much things to do. I go to sleep at about 5:oo am when my mind is really unconscious and about to faint out. Will I end up being like nocturnal animals: sleep at day time and become active at night time?

     Last weekend, I went to a work at a Vietnamese restaurant. It is my part time job. I talked to a good friend of mine and I found out I am not the only person experience this nocturnal behavior. My friend is a good-looking strong Mexican young man. He worked there for only 3-4 days a week. And he would stay up all night playing PS game when he does not have to go to work on the next day. It also reminds me of an old friend. He would stay up all night playing the additive online game: World of Warcraft. 

     Is it the content of games and things people are spending time on really the main reason to cause the nocturnal behavior or is there something else? Am I trying to stretch out the time of one day? This is exactly what we do when we have so many things to do with so little amount of time available. Staying late working or playing on my computer helps me feel like I'm gaining extra hours for a day. I'm having more time to do what I'm doing.

Why I smoke?

     90% of the time I smoked I was alone, by my self. In my work place, I am very busy all day long. Every time I got a chance to sneak out of my boss sight, I go smoke. I love my girl friend. She doesn't like me to smoke. I hate to make her mad and upset every time she caught me smoking. People that are close to me like my family and relatives absolutely don't approve my smoking behavior. But I still could not stop smoking. Every time I got a chance to be alone, I smoke. It seems like the pressure of not having approval from the people around me makes me smoke more. But that's one reason.

     I like to smoke with a friend while I'm talking to him. At that moment, a cigarette seems to act like a social bond. We seem to understand each other more. I feel like we are having something in common. I like to smoke with someone who is older than me for the same reason. 

     Strangely, I smoke less when I'm in a good mood. I smoke a lot when I'm bored, stressed and sad. Honestly, I don't like smoking in the first place. I know a lot of teenagers try to smoke to show off and end up got addicted to it. But that is not the case. I admit I got addicted to the taste. Yet, there is something else in a cigarette that I need. A friend? I might be wrong. But that is the best word I can find to define what a cigarette means to me. 

     How could it be a friend if it could possibly cause me cancer? This is the key. When you were a kids, do you ever like a friend who invite you to join his naughty plan. I do. When one comes up with a great idea or a thrilling adventure. All the other kids love it even though there might be consequences. We always have fun doing that until we got caught and got punished. A cigarette acts just like that good old friend. And when you decide to join him, do you ever think about the consequence? 

     So if anyone tries to tell me to quit smoking. I would just smile. Because there are moments, a cigarette is all I need.